Thursday, March 22, 2012
My husband is finally getting to the point where he is helping out around the house again but this time he is on a short fuse sometimes. I just don't get it when I talk to him he says he is getting a headache, but then sometimes he is perfectly happy and talking to him doesn't irritate him. The part I don't get is that I keep doing the same thing all the time with no major changes at all. I think work is draining him and looking for a house is also draining him. I think he is starting to get depressed at life again. I love him and want to help him but I can't when he is being so ornery sometimes. The other thing that drives me nuts is that I got two complaints about him this weekend. My friend Michelle said that it was a very bad thing that they were in the nursery together because if something happened it would be a he said she said type of deal. It's not like he would actually touch her or her touch him and it irritates me. Does he really come off that way god I hope not. I still want to be her friend but it just irritates me. The other thing is that he irritated me little sister Becky who is doing really good in her program to not act bipolar anymore. He said that she threatened to kill him and he said you better send some of your friends out there too. But I was four wheeling with my little brother when this happened so I do not know what really happened. My question is how do you be in a relationship with someone that you can't trust this is driving me crazy. But if I do leave I will instantly be kicked out of membership with my church again and I would lose time with my daughter and I want to see my baby girl as much as I can. I never want to let her go ever. I will never be my mom and abandon my baby girl like she abandoned me and my sister so many times in my life. But maybe if I do it when she is young and I gain her back right away she won't notice and it won't hurt so bad I am really truly stuck here. GRR my life sucks. At least I have good friends and a good family that will support me though.